Motivation is the driving force behind self-improvement, but maintaining a strong sense of motivation can be difficult. Motivation is the hidden secret behind leadership and growth. Intrinsic and extrinsic motivation energizes, maintains, and enhances work and life. Practically, a motivated person is more likely to innovate, set goals, deliver quality work, lead an effective life, and become productive.
The three days course was facilitated by Mr. Shaurab Lohani, Corporate Trainer & Life Coach. The session overall was really interactive where participants could engage in group discussions, one on one discussions and let go of their deepest fears.
First off, it started with a warm introduction from everyone followed by a lot of questions regarding what they are currently doing and what they would like to do in the future.
After a warm welcome, we discussed how we can motivate ourselves. Also known as intrinsic motivation and what are the causes of why we are not able to motivate ourselves.
Mr. Lohani talked about fear; Positive fear and negative fear where positive fear makes you realize the importance of lives and negative ones leaves you in despair, making you realize you cannot do anything.
In the session, Mr. Lohani talked about all these in detail, which can be read below:
- Is fun and exciting
- Helps you perform better
- Helps you stay in the present moment and focus
- Helps you socialize and bond with people
- Helps you live life to the fullest
- Makes you realize the importance of life
- Affects you mentally
- Does not keep you motivated
- Makes you perform anything slowly
- Keeps your reaction to anything very mundane
While positive fear, to a certain extent, is very good for your physical health and your mental health, negative fear can be equally draining to both these.
Mr. Lohani further stated that there is another type of fear as well. These are real fear and unreal fear. The real fear is something that you absolutely fear the most, you cannot get away with it. For example: “if I do not present my idea in front of people, I might lose my job or promotion”, “I am scared of darkness because few incidents had happened in the alley in the dark” these are some real fears that people can have.
Whereas, unreal fear is something that is put inside of you by some external factors such as your friends, family, society, and oftentimes even by yourself. For instance: “I cannot speak in front of the crowd, my heartbeat increases and I might faint” and “I am really scared of dark and ghosts” are the unreal fear that is put inside of you.
Moreover, it is really good to understand your real fear and unreal fear for motivation because we sometimes may not be able to identify why we are fearing certain things, and thus, we may get away from the opportunity that is right in front of us. It also plays a huge role in your leadership abilities. Since not knowing your own fears means you have not dug deep into your own self and if you are not able to motivate yourself, then it will be hard to motivate the people around you.
Mr. Lohani then gave us a group task to identify the reason and bring out a solution for different kinds of fear that people tend to have.
The discussion, onwards, moved to the causes of fear/what makes us fearful. Again, among many, there were few but very relevant bullet points provided.
Causes of Fear
- Your bringing up is a cause of fear: When you are in a family that says if you fail you cannot do anything, then it sticks to your mind forever; it is also an unreal fear, but also a huge cause of fear. You then think that you cannot do anything. So, it is good to identify this fear as well. Not only family, as stated earlier, but there can also be a lot of other factors as well which highly depend on how/from where you are brought up.
- Perception: Thinking what people might say about me when you say a certain thing in public is a cause of fear. It is based on the perception you gather.
- Stress: Too much stress also causes fear in the mind.
- News and information: Negative news is not good and imposes fear in one’s mind.
- Past incidents: Can be certain dreadful action you have seen or experienced on your own which makes you fearful.
- Genetic: If family members have a history of fear, then it can also be passed on. Which then, causes a similar fear most of your families may have.
Therefore, understanding fear is important because then, you will understand why you are demotivated or how you should be motivated. You need to identify what is stopping you to pursue something, why you are not able to lead. For that, communication is also very important because people will be able to find a solution for you once you communicate with them. You too will know what is stopping you and what should be done if you tell others how you feel. All these factors are very important to keep yourself motivated and to lead others.
Moving on, the session went on to a discussion on unlearning a lot of things. We know that once certain things have been learned and been imposed into your mind, it is very difficult to let it out. But, letting negative knowledge, fake fear, and unlearning is important to further succeed.
When someone gives you an idea, insight, or suggestions, you have to question if it is good enough, whether or not you have to consume it and why you should or should not consume it. That way, you get a clear picture of what you should learn and what should stay in your brain.
- Be open to ideas and suggestions: Being open to others’ opinions, ideas, and suggestions, considering that carefully and taking the final decision on your own is important.
- Cross-check your ego: It is not good to hold on to certain bad attitudes or your own. Let go of that attitude so welcome newer ideas.
- Try the unfamiliar:Communicating with new people, trying things you feared the most is also important to learn new things.
- Listen to your gut instincts
- Make mistakes
Unlearning is necessary to also let go of your fear since you will be open to a lot of ideas to unlearn, people appreciate and that that makes you a good leader.
More so, it is really important to consider what external factors motivate you. Also known as extrinsic motivation. It takes place through communication and observation. Likewise, extrinsic motivation is hard. Be it in terms of motivating others or being motivated by others. But in the same way, it is equally important to become a great leader.
How can we motivate(ourselves and others)?
- Find and ask questions: finding the core of any problems and asking the people or yourself what caused that problem; was it just you or some external factors? And identifying these problems, looking at it clearly is necessary.
- Show empathy: being emotionally supportive, considering likes and dislikes, making positive talks.
- Not make fun: not mocking by saying their problem is not huge or being funny about how they talk
- Remind them of positive aspects: making them stronger, saying positive things, and making positive vibes around them.
- Give them 2 to 3 points of improvement: what should one do when one is demotivated, finding answers to the questions.
- Make sure you are available for help
- Close it with points again
Lastly, there are a lot of factors that motivate you. It is necessary to know what, which person and which place motivates you.